Patagonia DAS Parka
MSRP: $259-269
My Price (via eBay): $169 + shipping
Rating: 4/5 stars
Acquisition Method: Savvy shopping turned schooled.

Important Note on Feeling Schooled-I was pretty happy paying $100 below MSRP for a brand new one on eBay. Until I came across it on Patagonia's website (linked above) for $99 bucks. But only in the color and size I procured. That's called getting schooled. Now, on to the review.

Simply put, if you can compare a big, puffy coat to a rock, this is the one.

Stretching similes aside, the Patagonia DAS parka is everything I'd hoped for and more for my chosen application, back country snowboarding in Washington's miserable (in a good way) winter weather. Cold, wet, wind, and more wind had me pondering purchasing a insulated jacket half heartedly for the last couple of years, but I never pulled the Visa trigger. With my nascent interest in ski mountaineering rapidly solidifying, however, the need for a real insulation layer for extended trips into the Great White North was quickly making itself clear.

I got to the point where the only thing stopping me was a healthy apprehension to down. Sure, it's great for yuppie Xmas shopping trips to Westlake or putting the finishing touch on the Big Outdoorsman on Campus look in the quad, but in the PNW a healthy mistrust of something that gets cold and dies when wet is well placed. So I figured synthetic was the way to go.

My criteria were few: built by a mountaineering company, 'cause snowboard industry product generally sucks, and hooded, 'cause that's how hood's roll. Google searches led me to believe I had exactly one choice meeting these parameters, the DAS. So I bought one.

Luckily, the one choice, at least without any basis for comparison beyond non statistically controlled individual comfort, seems to be the best choice as well. And reviews are all about the reviewer, right?

The DAS is roomy, warm, and seemingly impervious to the weather thrown at it to date. Heavy snow, high winds, broken clouds/bluebird skies, and 32.9 degree slush have all caught me in it, but I've yet to get wet or to warm.

The water beads off the Deluge DWR (which I think is the house blend of shell fabric) readily. Again, this also includes slush sitting on/melting off the shoulders and neck.

It'll need to make it past branches and snags successfully before it ever gets to need rewaterproofing, which is always a puffy's downfall, but assuming it does so I have every confidence it'll keep on performing. Also, synthetics are far easier to clean than down. Read cheaper.

And the thing is WARM-I've ridden in it from 25 to 32ish degree's in a bike jersey for a underlayer, and have remained, for lack of a better word, absolutely cozy. Its got a baggy cut for sure, which I, having fought in the West Coast Rap War's of the early 90's, don't mind one bit. I'm 5'11.9999" tall and 207 at the weigh in, and I might go for a large rather than XL next time, but the cut does allow plenty of room to carry skins, or a chihuahua, easily inside and hence warm. I've tried both so you don't have to.

The one thing I might've added to the parka, and thats might've, is pit zips. For the approach, thats likely a need specific to the PNW. But it rocks as is. Plus you look like Junior Mafia silhouetted on the ridge.

simultaneously cloaking and choking the Cascades. Ironically enough, given the huge snow levels over the past few days (as well as couple weeks), I elected not to go riding this weekend. The reasons?

Well, they were legion.

A avalanche forecast that's been weaving between high and extreme danger like a drunk lift op for the last 10 days. No back country for me.

Extra juicy: yesterday the NWAC forecast called out the possibility of historic slides:

Some very large and infrequently active paths have released during
this avalanche cycle. Some paths have slid for the first
time in twenty five years and avalanches have crossed all
the major Washington passes. All the Washington Cascade
passes (Snoqualmie, Stevens, and White) as well as the Mt Baker highway and Mt Rainier NP
remain closed as of early Saturday.

Examples would include:

A slide at Alpental, maybe the Phantom Coulour, that ran past the condo's into the first row of parked cars, knocking mini-vans around. Irony Supplement: The slides deposition zone, where the debris forming the slide is deposited, is right over the top of Alpental's BCA Beacon Practice Area.

A slide over in Leavenworth that took out a house on a golf course. Scroll down for now-ya-see-it, now-ya-don't shots!

One thing of interest I did find doing "research" for this, or more accurately looking at snow porn-images and text depicting water vapor crystallizing while airborne in a prurient fashion-is the WSDOT blog and Flickr account.

It's been a hairball winter for sure, and the slides depicted bring that home.

To most, that probably seems less than titillating, but seeing as how it allows a peek behind the scenes at the states Cascade Passes conditions, I figured there probably at least one person out there who'd get off on it, so to speak.

Complicating the lift accessed scene, I-90's been closed more than its been open over the last 2 weeks, Hwy. 2 Stevens has been closed since Thursday night, 542 was closed Saturday with a determination about Sunday posted at 4:50 something this morning. All this mapped to Crystal being packed today as well, and sleeping in became a viable option. So, being a man of action, I did so.

Given our La Nina winter and the epic snow fall it's brought, perhaps all this mayhem (and lack of access to the mountains we love) begs the question, is it possible to have to much of a good thing?

Thanks to cellular technology I just had the chance to talk to the infamous Snoslut as he skinned out alone in "winds and heavy snow" towards East Peak in Crystals backcountry.

The word is his skin tracks are filling in between laps and the wind is high. Hasn't seen any cracking or "whoomphing", and he's calling the snowpack safe.

Next line will be a 40 degree gully, prime slide angle plus terrain trap. He's calling it a good test.

Ever have a friend you're a bit scared of?

I'll be talking to him tonite re plans tomorrow. Loco!

Did I mention beer? Pre-presentation socializing from 7-7:30.

Lowell's presentation of his multi year quest to ski the Cascade Crest from Mt. Baker to Mt. Rainier will be presented tonite, with the $5 admission charge to benefit the NW Avalanche Center, a invaluable resource for all snow seekers and backcountry blazers.

Lowell couples personal photo's and recollections with historical films and background on early pioneers of the NW's ski mountaineering community to weave a tale not just of his quest, but the evolution of backcountry skiing in the NW as a whole, giving credit to those who pioneered the way.

Come out and show your love-more info at The Alpenglow Project.

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At least Yurt Bowl at Cascade Powder Cats.

e.g. money.

After reading one to many honey flavored, oily reviews of the almighty product in my never ending quest to secure the backpack of destiny, the need to draw a line in the snow became clear. And so it has come about that I see fit to banish reviews fueled by free product and written by paraphrasing the attached tags, including sticker price. To long has the reviewer been a pitfall to the proletariat!

Besides, free lancers just give free swag a good review in the hopes that when they sell it on Craigslist to buy gruel, or a seasons pass, or gold paint, it will garner mid level dollars. Or so I've heard.

Anyway, the line in the sand is drawn. it's been this way in the past, but at this point I'm announcing to both my readers the following policy: from this point backwards and forwards, all items, experiences, and party affiliations reviewed in this damnable blog will be bought, begged, borrowed, or stolen. I give you my solemn word.

I predicate a crime wave-guess which 2 methods haven't been deployed yet?

The other important thing about this rules change, nay paradigm shift, is price. Reviews always show sticker price, the implicit agreement between manufacturers and magazines being to prop up price points with product porn. I propose a change to this rule, one that I hope will meld the game to the mores of the proletariat. Part of the hunt is the chase-from now on I'll document every sweaty moment I spend crawling through some Craigslist alley or trying to determine copyright infringement from a eBay thumbnail to find CHEAP S&%T. Anyone who is passionate about something is broke, after all, right? Either from spending to much time or money on it. Perfect example-crackheads. Whether they're Whitney Houston or Bobby Brown, they're passion has led them to make sacrifices, right? Like marrying Bobby Brown.......or Whitney Houston.

Right. Game on.

Baker are where stars are born, as I've contended in earlier posts. However, apparently its also where Darwin gets his kicks.

A Bellingham woman was a victim of a slab avalanche coming off White Salmon's slanted sheet metal roof-from the Bellingham Herald:

"Rex Hilsinger, a snowboard instructor at the resort, said he was inside the White Salmon Lodge at about 1:30 p.m. when the Volkswagen Beetle-sized slab slid from the roof and buried a woman in her mid-40s."

While this might sound like a cheap laugh in a National Lampoons vacation trilogy movie, apparently the woman suffered several broken ribs and a injury described as

"the icy mass appeared to have partially scalped her."

OUCH.

There are a number of things wrong with this painting of White Salmon, but the one that would seem to jump out most quickly as you grabbed the plastic lawn chair and stepped over the rope line, meant to keep you out from under the eaves, would be the large slabs of snow creeping down the roof as the sun warmed them. Unfortunately, apparently that detail wasn't one readily noted by the victim.

The other things wrong?
1) Good visibility at Baker.
2) The fact that skiers outnumber snowboarders at Baker.
3) All those without gear heading for the lodge???
4) And finally, the depiction of a Ford Aerostar arriving at Baker in one piece is optimistic to say the least.

Regardless, hopes for a speedy recovery and lesson learned.

The boys from Ride made it out to Cascade Powder Cats a little before we did, and as a bonus apparently they're a little more proficient with a video camera than I am-what can I say, beginners luck.....

Anyway, here's their video, just to provide you the full multi-media experience. Which is not superior to doing it in what folks call "the real world".

Return of the Nina chill's the heart, which is a welcome quality in a riding film. It's shots are big, they're gray and they're silent, just like a perfect day in the steep and deep that awaits on a still day, glistening across Bakers rope lines. ROTN recaps 7 years of Baker riding, but in case that isn't enough nuclear winter footage for you, Ma Nature threw down 2 La Nina cycles in the course of filming, including of course the muthadawg, 98-99.

The perfect day at Baker is the closest you'll ever get to complete stillness without being the ball, Danny. Even bombing through the tree's.

Watch this film and forget what the sun looks like forever. Between the B&W riding footage and the scarceness of music in this puppy, it's perfect. Snow sucks sound, and black and white looks like flat light-ROTN feels like a pow day, taking advantage of the fact that sometimes less is more.

ROTN's notable lack of a soundtrack is key to making the film right-you can hear riders rustling across cold smoke powder laid down the night before, just like, ummm, never happens at Baker. Feels like nirvana. The sound of near silence, punctuated only by the even deeper stillness when the rider leaves the surface for the air.

There are big lines in this, and they're coupled with backflip's, 3's and 5's, etc. But the thing that ROTN does that Mack Dawg hasn't in a while is takes snowboarding into the wild, rather than trying to make snowboarding wild. No kooky dooky jumps and haircuts in SLC, just Gore-Tex, powder beards, and big mountains on deep days. By way of contrast, the last MD preview I saw featured helicopter transport to a kicker, surrounded by completely neglected ridgelines. I wonder if they took a XBox?

Lastly, a honest assessment of the risks taken in the back country is paired with footage of a rider slashing down a steep line before getting smacked blindside by a slide on a heelside turn, and shooting into a tree trunk with a audible impact. ROTN captures the first few moments of stillness following the impact, as the parties collective breathe is taken away, followed by a frantic rush of adrenalin and fear. You can almost feel both sides of the coin-the victim reeling from the impact, hopefully above the surface, and the massive adrenalin dump, accompanied by fear and action, hitting the rescuers simultaneously.

Bottom line, Return of the Nina is the realest snowboard movie I've seen in way to long. And I've only watched 3:30 of it on YouTube.

somebody tell him infamous means famous in a bad way.

And where would you get just a shovel handle, anyway?