Posted by kayjay at 4/25/08 10:44 a.m.

The same kinda thing totally happened to me a couple of weeks ago! I went to a baseball game with some friends from college, who also brought friends. Halfway through the game, one of the friends turns to me and says, "This is random, but are you on a Web site called PlentyofFish.com?"

Turns out that I'd exchanged a couple of emails with him six months ago before deciding that I was totally over the online dating scene...for the exact reason you mentioned above. ALL the same people on ALL the sites!

Weird. And maybe kind frustrating...

Posted by quantumcat at 4/25/08 12:32 p.m.

It may be a little surprising to bump into someone by happenstance whom you had chatted with or they had perused your online profile. It does not surprise me that you seem to see much the same people on the sites. If you frequent the same bar or restaurant, wouldn't you expect to see many of the same people who also like that bar or restaurant?

The people frequenting the sites are a select group that meet certain criteria. They're single (most of them), computer literate and must be "ballsy" enough to put themselves out there on dating sites. Only a certain number of people are going to fit that bill. Would you find it very surprising to see the same people over and over at multiple triathalons? Only people fit enough and courageous enough (or masochistic depending on your pov) are likely to be there. Would it be surprising to see the same people over and over at salsa dance contest? Afterall they would be of a select group of those adept enough and confident enough to be there.

I think the significant point 20something brings up is that once you put data on the internet, it's there for all users to see regardless of whether you decide at some point to discontinue your personal involvement. I personally stopped playing online games years ago, but the fan-sites still have the information regarding my performance (and any personal details I chose to share). Whenever I post anything on the internet (user profiles, blog posts, chat rooms - it's stored on a server somewhere) I consider it similar to having it posted on a billboard along the highway.

I dare say that if it was someone that you had an interest in, then it would be a welcome circumstance. As long as it is someone you don't have an interest in then you're likely to find it intrusive and creepy. It's similar to men and women liking someone to approach them. It's great as long as it's the "right kind" of person.

Don't forget - you went to the dating sites too and I bet there are a few males out there that are also saying, "I'm always seeing the same people online."

Posted by unregistered user at 4/27/08 2:05 p.m.

Kudos for putting pictures up that look like yourself! I can't believe how many stories I hear from people when they put up misleading pics.

I feel like the online dating police should get on this.

But damn... who knew Seattle was so small huh?

Posted by unregistered user at 4/28/08 6:54 a.m.

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Posted by Special K at 4/28/08 9:35 a.m.

Can't I just pay a service to have me fill out a survey and then hook me up with someone who filled out the same survey in a similar manner to myself?

Posted by 20Something at 4/29/08 8:50 a.m.

I agree that online dating is sort of like a hobby where you're going to see the same people, but perhaps I was just hoping it was going to be a bit bigger, giving the city pulls from metropolitan major and outlying cities such as Bellevue, Kirkland, Issaquah, etc. Something like horseback riding or what-have-you seems reasonable to have a small sample pool. I guess it just surprised me to discover how small the online dating sample pool was. And that I've seen at least, AT LEAST four men that I recognize from the site in my daily life.

Pictures. Ah geez. I went on one of the proverbial dates where the dude looked nothing like the pictures. And I mean NOTHING. It was my first date, and he was so nice. I didn't want to be shallow or hurt his feelings, so I just went with the date. We had a lot of fun together, but there wasn't a romantic connection.

I'll check SparkBliss.com out...see what it's like. I've been on PlentyofFish.com and it's free, which is nice. What I don't appreciate about some online dating sites is that anyone, whether a member or not, can read through the profiles. It'd be nice if some were a bit more private.

Special K: That's what most online dating sites are. I know eHarmony makes you fill out an extensive survey, then hooks you up with others who have similar interests. And the photos don't come into play until the third or fourth contact, which I didn't like. But dating sites are like bars--there are different bars for everyone. Some like dive bars, some like Belltown bars. Some like eHarmony, some like Match.com.

Posted by Exposed NYC at 5/5/08 1:28 a.m.

Oh yeah, I'm ALWAYS weary about privacy issues. Facebook is in the middle of dealing with criticism for this (for making info available to all members of any group you join, with an opt out as opposed to opt in policy).

I like to Google my name on a regular basis, or I would have never known that articles I wrote for my college newspaper (and an embarrassing high school photo accompanying a local paper article) will follow me around the internets forever.

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