The Turkey Bowl, which benefits the homeless and the Whisker City cat shelter, will be held at the West Seattle Bowl Saturday at noon.

Celebrity guests include former Seahawks fullback Mack Strong, KING-TV anchor Dennis Bounds, KING-TV weatherman Rich Marriott, ex-Mariner Dave Henderson, M's play-by-play man Rick Rizzs, Shelly and Miranda of the Sea Gals, former hydro driver Chip Hanauer, gardening extraordinaire Ciscoe Morris, former guitarist from the Presidents of the United States of America Chris Ballew, Roger Levesque and Kevin Secuda of the Sounders and Rick the Peanut Man.

Cost is $65. Entry fee includes balls, shoes, lunch, a gift and bowling with the celebrities. There figure to be spots still available, but just to make sure, call 206-533-1423 for more information.

Or just show up and take part in the silent auction featuring all kinds of items, including sports memorabilia.

IRVING, Texas - Former UW quarterback Isaiah Stanback still wants to be a quarterback. He's a kick returner with the Dallas Cowboys, and he's supposed to be a wide receiver, too, but a dislocated shoulder, among other things, has prevented him from cracking the lineup.

Even if he was completely healthy, the Cowboys are well-stocked with receivers, led by Terrell Owens and Roy Williams, acquired last month from the Lions. Stanback has not caught a pass since he had two receptions in the first game of the year against Cleveland.

Nonetheless, he appeared happy Tuesday afternoon when I spoke to him in the Cowboys' locker room. He's in his second year in the NFL and collecting a paycheck, so what's not to like so far?

"It's goin' cool," Stanback said. "There are a lot of guys ahead of me. I've just got to find a role."

He dislocated his shoulder last year and did it again this year, and now he plans to have off-season surgery. Stanback, 24, said it doesn't bother him.

I was surprised when he said he still wants to be a quarterback and thinks he could be a good one in the NFL. "But I'm under contract here to play receiver," he said. "I'll do what I'm supposed to do here."

Stanback, who is in the second year of a four-year contract, also said of his future as a quarterback: "I don't think it will (happen here)."

Then, of course, I brought up his former team, the Huskies.

"It's rough, it's hard, man," Stanback said. "They've got to stop making the schedule so darn tough. Most of the big teams around the country schedule lesser-talented opponents to get the momentum rolling."

Asked specifically about his former coach, Tyrone Willingham, Stanback said: "When you find out your coach is not going to be around anymore, you lose all motivation to play."

He watched part of the Apple Cup. Asked for his thoughts on the game, Stanback said: "Terrible. Anytime you lose to Washington State, it's terrible, I don't care what year it is. I hate losing to them."

CHILLIN' WITH TANK: Truly, I had not planned to ask Cowboys backup defensive tackle Tank Johnson any questions about pit bulls or guns...well, OK, maybe one or two, but it didn't matter, the former Husky wasn't in the mood to talk to reporters Tuesday afternoon.

He shooed everyone away, but I asked him a question anyway.

"Are you answering Husky questions?" I asked.

"I'm not answering any Husky questions," said Johnson, 26.

"Did you watch the Apple Cup?" I asked.

"That's a Husky question," he said.

End of interview.

COMING THURSDAY: Owner Jerry Jones talks about his Cowboys, his new $1.2 billion stadium and whatever else he wants to talk about when I sit down with him Wednesday morning at Texas Stadium.

How's this for a traditional Apple Cup bet? Tom Rose, owner of the Nordland General Store on Marrowstone Island near Port Townsend, takes the Cougars, and his buddy Pat McNerthney takes the Dawgs in every Apple Cup.

The loser has to go across the street, walk to the end of the dock and jump into Mystery Bay. Water temperature: 42 degrees.

Last year McNerthney jumped in right when the legendary Husky, Don McKeta, cruised up to the dock in his boat.

"What are you guys doing?" McKeta asked.

"This is what we do to Huskies when they lose the Apple Cup," Rose told him.

The tradition is in its eighth year, and Rose leads with four jumps to McNerthney's three.

"This year we'll get it evened up," said Rose, a 1968 Chief Sealth grad who grew up a Husky fan. His allegiances changed when his two daughters went to WSU.

HOLMGREN'S THOUGHTS – Seahawks coach Mike Holmgren said he'll watch the game.

"This year, with both schools struggling … I don't think it takes anything away from that game. I really don't. Not for the participants, not for the alumni. And then of course, I've got a little vested interest in Washington. My son-in-law works over there, but yet I have some really good friends, a couple of my coaches, from Washington State. I'll watch a little bit and root for those kids. Both those schools are proud schools, and good schools, and they'll be back, just like we will."

When asked who he'd really be rooting for, Holmgren said: "I'm kind of neutral, but my son-in-law has to work because he's married to my daughter. That's the number one thing on my mind."

Holmgren's son-in-law is Matt Peterson, the UW's program coordinator for football recruiting.

NOTE TO READERS: The following column was supposed to run last June. And then it was supposed to run in September. It was essentially killed by P-I sports editor Nick Rousso, a UW alum who thought the premise of the column was utterly ridiculous.

I had a hard time understanding how this one was singled out because all of my columns are utterly ridiculous. But Rousso, an uppity Mercer Island high grad, deemed it unfit for print. (Oh, that's right, uppity's redundant with MI grads.)

Provided he doesn't kill it again, the column appears today in cyberspace during an appropriate time of year, Apple Cup week, when cheap shots are encouraged.

NOTE TO CONTEST WINNERS: My apologies for being such a deadbeat contest-runner. It won't surprise you to learn that I've lost your contact information. Please send me an email so I can get your prizes to you in an untimely fashion.

With that, the killed column returns from the dead…

Last spring the Huskies announced a search for a new school song to add to the ones they already have. They wanted students, alums and faculty to participate, asking for lyrics that captured the spirit and tradition at Washington.

The winning lyrics were sent to Bill Conti of "Rocky" fame to write the new song, which was released in September.

Catherine Henderson wrote the winning lyrics for the song, "Rise Up With Pride For Washington" and received $1,000 plus a lifetime membership in UW Alumni Association.
A mother of three, Henderson is a senior in the U-Dub's evening program in the humanities. Donna Schultz of Bellevue and Jessica Garbern, a bioengineering major, won $500 each as the runners-up.

Because this was a big deal to the Huskies – 382 entries were submitted – I thought it was ripe to be spoofed by their rivals at Washington State. I ran a contest within a contest and asked Cougars to describe in their lyrics what Washington meant to them.

As is the case with all of my mindless ventures, this one failed miserably. I was overwhelmed by the number of entries - I stopped counting at 11 because there wasn't a 12th. With an array of targets, I expected numerous jabs at the Dawgs and got a few.

This whole thing was such a fiasco that one of the better cheap shots came from a U-Dub fan, Mike Burgess, who wrote the following about a WSU defensive back who served time in the Whitman County jail last spring:

"Maybe Xavier Hicks will be inspired to write the song as he looks out at downtown Colfax through a bar-filled window. It would be much the same as Francis Scott Key writing the national anthem."

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I goofed on the Paul Wulff comment in Tuesday's column about the Apple Cup. He actually said: Huskies bark and bite, and Cougars hunt and kill, not fight and kill, though neither is happening this year. Thanks to emailer Kyle Nash, who brought that to my attention.

Monday night I spoke to Wulff about the hunt-and-kill comment, and others that he made pertaining to his goal of wanting Washington State to be the premier program in the state.

"The whole intent behind all of it was for Cougars," Wulff said. "I'm a true Cougar. It's important to me in terms of the rivalry. It was never to poke a finger at Washington. All of my comments were directed toward Washington State."

"GAMEDAY" TO INTERVIEW COUG: Emailer Dave Johnson reports that Tom Pounds, the WSU alum behind the Cougar flag's weekly appearances on "ESPN's College GameDay," has been contacted and will be interviewed live on the show from his home in Albuquerque on Saturday. The show airs from 7 to 9 a.m. Johnson said it's Pounds' goal to have "GameDay" appear in Pullman someday.

In a USA Today story last month, Pounds said he has a network of 111 flag-waving helpers across the country, and that the flag has made more than 70 consecutive appearances behind the set manned by Chris Fowler, Lee Corso and Kirk Herbstreit.

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Maybe the headline's misleading, but this week I called his agent, Brian Goldberg, to request an interview with Ken Griffey Jr.

As you know, the future Hall of Famer is a free agent, and there's no telling if he is interested in rejoining the Mariners or if the Mariners are interested in having him back.

I missed Goldberg's return call, but his voice mail indicated that a few teams have interest in Griffey, though it's early in the process.

"He's going to take some time to see what's out there," Goldberg said. "He's not about pushing for the highest dollar; it's about what situation looks best for him."

Griffey had arthroscopic knee surgery after the season to repair partially torn cartilage and meniscus. Goldberg said Griffey believes his sore knee was the issue behind his loss of power this season.

Jack Zduriencik will have to determine whether he should consider bringing him back or not, but the new Mariners' GM is busy interviewing managerial candidates.

Friday is the first day that teams can actively pursue free agents from other teams.

For sentimental reasons, I'd love for Griffey to return. He's the best player I've ever seen, and it would be good to have him back and retire in a Mariners uniform.

For baseball reasons, since the Mariners are rebuilding, you can make a case for not signing a legend who will turn 39 on Nov. 21.

I'd still make a strong pitch for him anyway. Griffey as a DH and Griffey as a right fielder and just plain old Griffey at Safeco Field again sounds good to me.

With a healthy knee and barring another injury, Griffey could produce two or three more seasons averaging 25 to 30 home runs and 90 to 100 RBIs.

He has 611 career home runs. We could watch him move into fourth on the all-time list in 2010 when he passes Willie Mays (660).

Here's to hoping the Mariners make it happen.

Regarding Thursday's column on Rick Neuheisel, this email from San Diego:

"Fourteen years ago I was diagnosed with testicular cancer and went through a grueling 90-day chemotherapy cycle. I lost 20 pounds, had no hair, could barely walk and then lost my job which included health insurance. Turning my life around and getting back on my feet again was like climbing Mount Everest. To say the least, my confidence was pretty thin those days.

"Six months after completing chemotherapy I was in Dallas over the holidays. Colorado was playing Oregon in the Cotton Bowl, so I decided to call Rick to see if I could get a ticket to the game. Rick and I hadn't spoken for over 5 years, he was pretty big-time, so when I left the message I wondered if he'd call back.

"Rick called me later that night and said, "Matty, I got you a sideline pass with a parka, because its going to be cold that night. Not only do I want to see you at the game, but we have two more practices left and a Cotton Bowl dinner, and I hope you come by my room at the Hyatt. Me and my family want to see you."

"I was ecstatic that he just called me back. I went to practice, the dinner and then the game. Rick treated me special, and I desperately needed to feel good about myself again, so it was quite a shot in the arm.

"By the way, Rick didn't know I had cancer."

- Matt Stevens, radio analyst for UCLA football games and former backup QB to Neuheisel.

But don't despair. Many Neuheisel haters filled my in-box, along with a columnist hater named Dustin:

"Neuheisel's awesome. Barbara Hedges is an idiot. Yawn. Are you just cutting and pasting old columns at this point?

"Take a peak across the hall at Art Thiel if you want to see what a real writer looks like."

Dear Dustin: Hands down, Art's the best sportswriter in town. I've worked with him for 26 years so I already know what he looks like. He's a real writer who's real tall. Oh, and if he showed up at the office more often, maybe I would take a peek at him, not a peak.

WESTWOOD, Calif. - UCLA defensive coordinator Dewayne Walker would like to be a candidate to replace UW football coach Tyrone Willingham.
When asked after the Bruins' Tuesday afternoon practice if he'd be interested in the Huskies' job, Walker said: "No question. The big question, would they be interested in me?"
Walker nearly ended up at the UW before the season started. Willingham wooed him and wanted him to become his new defensive coordinator and replace Kent Baer. Walker instead chose to stay at UCLA, leading to Willingham's hiring of Ed Donatell.
Asked if he was glad he stayed in Westwood, Walker said "no question" again. But he admits to being highly interested in becoming the Huskies' next head coach.
"It's a football school with a great program," said Walker, who knows. His brother, Clyde Walker, was best friends with Warren Moon in the late 1970s. He attended the 1978 Rose Bowl when Washington beat Michigan.
"Don James treated me like royalty," Walker said. "I grew up around Husky football."
He thinks he'd be a good head coach, saying: "I've had so many lessons and worked with great head coaches. I understand what the formula should be."
Walker said he has not been contacted by UW AD Scott Woodward but hopes he will be. But even if he isn't...
"Just my name being mentioned is an honor," Walker said.
Walker is said to be one of the top defensive coordinators in college football.

All day Tuesday emails poured -- OK, trickled – into my in-box with Wazzu alums expressing more and more skepticism about coach Paul Wulff.

What readers have to say is quite frequently a lot more interesting and entertaining than my column, and the following emails are the latest example of that.

MIKE IN OREGON: So what's your honest take on Wulff? At first I was willing to suffer through a 1-win or 2-win season, but after last week I just don't get it. Can this
guy coach or not?

How does a coaching staff get two weeks to prepare for an average Stanford team and lay down for a 58-0 whoopin'? Losing that bad to USC is one thing, but Stanford, really???

And keep in mind that Stanford and USC are putting in kids that have never played before to "let up" in the 2nd half, and we still give it up like a drunk prom queen.

I don't know Jim, I just don't know. I love WSU second to only my wife and kids, and I have been a Cougar fan since I was 12...growing up in the smelly shadows of Montlake. But Wulff is killing that passion I once had for WSU football.

I am tired of the ribbing by Beaver and Duck fans and what's worse, now I am sick of not getting teased. It's like WSU has become the special kid in PE and nobody wants to make fun of him anymore.

ED, A '73 ALUM: I don't know if Wulff is the right man for the job. I doubt the hire as much now as I was for it in the beginning. I'm so sickened now by what's going on under Wulff that I can't describe it.

Coach Wulff is giving everyone a perfect reason to belittle our program when the spotlight should be solely on (UW coach Tyrone Willingham). This goes way beyond apathy. It's like being on the other side of hell. I don't see how anyone can take any more of this.

KEVIN IN NEBRASKA: No doubt this is WSU's worst team ever. But something deep inside me thinks that the Cougs will pull out a win in the Apple Cup. (The Cougs) try too damn hard and wind up looking like they don't try at all, and some upperclassmen, frankly, don't give a damn. It's in a game like an in-state rivalry where all of a sudden somebody decides they do care, and whattaya know, WSU wins 18-17.

They'll probably make me a liar, but I've seen weirder things happen, like the total rookie in the sales department who landed his one and only deal for the year that paid him an office-record setting $110,000 commission! Then he failed to make another sale the remainder of the year and quit.

CALE IN FLORIDA: I was actually at the Stanford game (I need counseling). Down 10-0, this team simply gave up. To be honest they showed glimpses of an offense the first three or four series, but once they lost their second turnover, they just shut it down. I was so (mad) my brother had to restrain me from going into the first row and berating the players and coaches for a lack of effort.

It is very clear there are more players than I thought who aren't listening to Wulff. Two weeks off to rest and prepare, and this is the best you can do? My gut is there are a lot of known names on this team that think Wulff and his Division II buddies can go to hell.

I listened to the game, read the stories about it and I've seen the terrible stats. All of that was bad enough, but nothing comes close to what e-mailer Josh Utt and I have been tracking:

In their last three games, the Cougars have been outscored 172-0. One more time for emphasis: 172-0. Now this time with an exclamation point: 172-0!

From late in the first half through the rest of the game three weeks ago in Corvallis, the Beavers outscored the Cougars 45-0. Then the 69-0 USC debacle in Pullman was followed by Stanford's 58-0 pasting of WSU in Stanford on Saturday.

Explain how this is possible. It's not, but with the Cougars, it is. And I'm predicting it will reach 200-0 by halftime of this Saturday's game at Martin Stadium when Arizona takes a 28-0 lead into the locker room. That's probably being kind -- it'll no doubt be 38-0.

Jim Walden hasn't done a Horizon Air scoring recap for the Cougars on the radio since Oct. 11 during the second quarter of the Beavers game.

I don't like taking shots at my alma mater, but come on. Over the years, Wazzu football fans have dealt with pathetic play at times, but this is beyond that. It's otherworldly pathetic, not to mention unacceptable and inexcusable.

Some blame former coach Bill Doba. Some blame the players. But the man ultimately responsible is coach Paul Wulff.